realize.

Yesterday I got to spend some much needed time with dani girl. 

It was like we were seven again. Not a worry in the world just the two of us being dorks. Talking with dani made me realize a lot of things. One of them being that it's not okay to lie to yourself. She shared things with me about a recent relationship she had and it reminded me a lot of the one I'm finding myself in now.

 With that being said I've come to realize that I've been rather selfish. How can I expect to be in a relationship when I know I'm leaving in a few short months. So I've come to the decision that the only relationship I need to work on is the one with my Heavenly Father.  

Dani helped me see that it's okay to feel certain ways and want to do certain things because it's natural man with that being said I need to put on the full armor of god and not just the bits and pieces I want. 

A few days ago I was able to receive a priesthood blessing. Prior to that I had someone ask me what the hardest thing was about deciding to go on a mission. As in what were some of the hardest trials I had to face. I couldn't exactly pin point it. If you couldn't tell that bothered me that I couldn't think of things. Then all of a sudden it clicked. For me the hardest part is that satan knows you. He knows what you really want and will try to give it to you in the most horrible way possible. Being natural men, of course we fall for it. It scares me that satan knows me so well but it also is comforting. Comforting because he knows I'm a strong daughter of god. I won't fall for his tricks so easily so he knows that he has to work twice as hard maybe even three times as hard. I am so confident in the person I am and the path that I'm on that satan will not stop me. I know he likes a challenge because he is constantly trying me. By all means keep the trials coming. I am becoming a strong servant of The Lord and nothing will stop me from sharing the gospel. 

I've realized that I am a blessed person who needs to be humbled daily. I need to communicate my feelings better and though I may want something now, I mustn't jeopardize my eternal salvation.

  Be grateful for everyday and take a moment each day to realize all the wonderful things that happen in your life daily. 

same team.

We are all on the same team. Lately this has been on my mind a lot. If we are all on the same team why do  people try so hard to tear others down? Why cause intentional pain to our team mates? We need to start acting like a team. 

Everybody that I know is out there for themselves. It's a crazy world that we are living in right now.  

This week instead of doing things that only benefitted me, I tried to do things that benefitted those around me. Leading out a helping hand to my neighbor caring in too many groceries, to doing the dishes at my grandmas house after family dinner. Little things of that nature. I'm pleased to say that I think those some acts of kindness really did make a difference. Everything just seemed to go smooth and there wasn't as much arguing and contention in our home. 

I just think that if we all looked at others with the knowledge that we are all on the same team, people would treat others better. We all just need to try and make the world better one day at a time, one kind act at a time, and with the pure intention to make everyone feel loved and appreciated. 

Don't take your team for granted. Ever. 

andy.

Wednesday night I went out on a date with a complete stranger. As soon as I left I felt sick to my stomach. Not a physical sickness but a sickness as in something didn't feel right. We went to a movie and I couldn't have been happier when it was over. I was so relieved and ready to go home. Instead my date decided we would go to the park and hang out. I still didn't feel right about it but off we went to the park. That's when it happened. 

The kid who had taken me to the park pulled out a bag of weed. He asked me to just try some and getting high was so fun. I literally felt like the world was ending. I said a prayer in my heart that I would be able to get of the horrible situation I had been placed in. As soon as I was done pleading with Heavenly Father my prayer was answered. 

Andy Perkins sent me a text and I knew everything was going to be okay. I quickly told my date that something had come up and I needed to go home immediately. I wasn't going to take no for an answer and this kid could clearly see it in my eyes. Without anything to say I was taken home and left unharmed. 

I don't know why Andy had decided to text me when he did but I truly believe it was inspiration. Andy has always been such an amazing friend and I have so much more respect for him. I don't think Andy will ever understand how grateful I am for such a simple act. Miricales happen everyday and when people are intuned with the spirit the most wonderful things happen. 

Andy, I really do love you for being such an amazing friend and for everything you do for me :) 

change.

Over the past couple of months if I've learned anything it's that things change. After high school some go to college, some serve missions, some get married and some just bum around. 

Thinking back to this time last year so much has changed. It's not really my cup of tea to have my whole world change so quickly but I'm learning to love it. 

Most of the time change is exactly what we need. Recently my cousin, Keanu, got his mission call to the Samoa, Apia mission. He seriously is one of the reasons I believe that anyone can change through the atonement of Christ and by will power. We've had countless conversations over the years and I always knew he would make it to this point in his life. I've never been more proud of him and know that if The Lord can humble Keanu, The Lord will humble. 

So even though times I may be bitter about change I know in my heart that it is good. 

I think that if we change ourselves to be better a little each day that we can leave the world a better place. Little things matter and never stop doing them. 

Keanu Jamir, my best friend since 1995. 

It's always been the three of us since I can remember. Now all three of us are going out to serve The Lord :)

Change is a good and humbling experience and I'm so blessed to have been able to go through all life's awkward changes with these two by my side.